Its excruciatingly painful to wake up & realise some or the other thing is expected of you. EVERY. F’ING. DAY. A project report, a test, a viva, a presentation, a co-curricular activity, an exam, and what not. Sometimes it feels as if the world is weighing down on your shoulders, all the problems and difficulties seem to block your way, you feel like all your commitments and responsibilities strangle your throat and limbs and all you can really do is lay on your bed motionless.

Its hard not to succumb to bed-rotting in a hustle-culture inspired by countless work-hours & deadlines. The constant chase for validation to be the most “productive”, “efficient” or to have great “time-management” skills. But what about the skills that make you feel more grounded in reality? What about a healthy & regulated nervous system that is not constantly plagued by anxious thoughts, fidgety fingers and the rapid leg shaking? What about the skills to ensure a person’s well being is prioritized more than a project deadline or a GPA? What about self-love & self-care?

My 4th sem clg exams ended almost half a month ago and I got done with all the assignments & submissions by the end of March. Now, that I finally get the much deserved break, I still feel weirdly anxious. I remember this one incident that happened three days ago, my mom asked me to sit & drink tea with her in the living room while watching TV at 6pm, as per usual desi household customs. The tea in my cup was almost gone when it dawned on me, that, I didn’t need to rush through my break anymore, I didn’t need to sprint to my room just to sit & study at my desk anymore. I could breathe, I could stay.

This weird epiphany made me wanna embrace slow living even more, nowadays I let myself read for hours on end, I listen to the birds chirping in the mornings, I let myself binge-watch a show if I really like it, I let myself talk to the people I love & am grateful to have in my life, without any time boundations, and I let myself fall asleep when I get tired.

These things may not seem very special but trust me, when you’ve been living on a deadline, sleeping at 1am & then waking up at 6am to revise for your exams, getting ready in 20 minutes so that you’re not late for college, always considering a time margin of 30 minutes when leaving home just in case you get stuck in traffic, having to get done a project report in 3 days, taking a brief break for 15 minutes between study sessions, setting the timer for 20 minutes to revise a subtopic, taking 10 minutes to make coffee. I could literally go on & on bout all these lil deadlines that we assign ourselves, they end up doing nothing but harm in the long run.

Us humans weren’t meant to be constantly exposed to the level of stress and intense amount of mental work that an average adult is exposed to right now. Sometimes, just giving yourself that space to relax without putting a time-limit to it, can be so much more healing than any self care ritual in the market. And maybe, just maybe, the world would seem less scary when you wake up from that nap, when you create that art, when you write that thought, when you sing out loud that one line of a song stuck in your head. I really hope you let yourself relax without a deadline sweetheart.

Thank you so much for reading my loves!! I genuinely can’t believe that more than a 1000 of you are interested in reading what I write. I shall stay forever grateful to all you. Love yall smmm <3

Remember you’re always loved.

xoxo

Shreya